What is Peer Pressure or Influence?
Peer influence is when teens choose to do something they wouldn’t otherwise do because they want to feel accepted and valued by their friends. It isn’t just or always about doing something against your will.
Peer influence refers to actions that empower your kid to get influenced positively and makes their life better, whereas peer pressure can be defined as actions that the kid does not want to do, but does out of sheer force.
You might hear the term peer pressure used a lot. But peer influence is a better way to describe how teenagers’ behavior is shaped by wanting to feel they belong to a group of friends or peers.
Peer pressure and influence can be positive. For example, your child might be influenced to become more assertive, try new activities, or get more involved with the school.
But it can be negative too. Some teenagers might choose to try things they normally wouldn’t be interested in, like smoking or behaving in antisocial ways.
Types of Peer Pressure or Influence
There are many types of peer pressure, including:
1. Spoken Peer Pressure
This type of peer pressure involves one individual or a group asking another individual to participate in some type of behavior. In a group setting, the pressure felt is much stronger as there is power in numbers.
2. Unspoken Peer Pressure
This type of peer pressure involves an individual being exposed to certain behaviors, trends or choices of others and feeling a pressure to conform.
3. Direct Peer Pressure
This type of peer pressure is challenging as it is very specific to behavior-based conformity and can be spoken or unspoken. Direct peer pressure can often feel heightened because of our own discomfort of the environment we’re in at that time of experiencing direct peer pressure.
4. Indirect Peer Pressure
This type of peer pressure is less invasive on our internal voice to behave a certain way, however, it can validate a behavior or activity we want to try but haven’t tried yet. It can be unspoken but also influence how we feel about ourselves.
5. Positive Peer Pressure
This type of peer pressure can be direct, indirect, spoken and/or unspoken. This is pressure felt in one-on-one situations or groups that yields positive results and healthier lifestyle choices.
6. Negative Peer Pressure
This type of peer pressure can also be direct, indirect, spoken and/or unspoken. This pressure can challenge individuals to do things they may not usually do and engage in such behaviors because others are doing so and it’s a way to belong.
Signs and Symptoms of Peer Pressure or Influence
Adopting a new habit that they never had
These new habits could be positive changes like waking up early, reading a book or general lifestyle changes like dressing style. however, negative habits could include smoking, drug or alcohol consumption.
Imitating their friends’ habits and lifestyle
Under peer pressure, teens and adolescents tend to pick up their friends’ habits and lifestyle to fit in. this gives them a feeling of being accepted and building a status quo.
Suddenly being rebellious or nonchalant about certain things
This behaviour trait is a major red flag. when a child is suddenly hostile and doesn’t care about things they used to, it means things are changing in their thought process and beliefs.
Change in their tone when they talk
Expressions can be masked alright, but the tone always sets the context. pay attention to your child’s tone when they speak. is it different? does it sound too frustrated and impatient as compared to before?
Being secretive about everything
An adolescent or teen needs privacy after a certain point and that’s okay. but being extra secretive about everything should cause suspicion. don’t invade their privacy, but be mindful of their communication.
peer influence refers to actions that empower your kid to get influenced positively and makes their life better. whereas peer pressure can be defined as actions that the kid does not want to do, but does out of sheer force.
Dealing with Peer Pressure or Influence
Recognising unhealthy dynamics
Parents must know their children’s friends, both regular and online friends. Children’s social media engagement must be monitored. If the child or adolescent shows unusual behaviour or avoids making eye contact, it is time for parents to intervene. Kids should be taught self-restraint before self-confidence! Also, children who are low in confidence may fall prey to peer pressure, so ,and teachers must play a key role in boosting the child’s confidence levels and evaluating their friendships. Use the buddy system, if need be.
It’s okay to make an excuse
It’s best to stay away from peers who encourage dangerous behaviour. Instead, it is wiser to spend time with kids who resist peer pressure or refuse indulgence in unwelcome activities.
Avoid the situation
Find friends who respect each other’s boundaries. It is good to stay away from friends who are a bad influence.
Be firm
One must know how to say ‘no’ when anything is inappropriate, or when it feels uncomfortable or unsafe. Talking it out with a grown-up that one can trust – like a parent, teacher, or school counsellor can be helpful. Encouraging open and honest communication is therefore imperative. That way kids will be comfortable discussing and telling how they feel before things have gone too far. At the same time, parents must teach their children to be assertive and resist any inappropriate situations.
